Hidan and Kakuzu The Journey
by Dr.Spaz2.0
Summary: Hidan and Kakuzu go on an adventure...not Yaoi. Rated for Language.
1. Chapter 1

Hidan: this does NOT look like the studio, man. did you get the wrong directions?!

Kakuzu: i thought we agreed that we wouldn't blame me if those hobos gave us the wrong directions?!

Hidan: i'm not blaming, i'm asking...and i'd say were pretty fucking lost! somebody needs to call the Fags that run this joint!

**our friends happen upon a strange mofo celebrity known as Madonna as the continue their quest for ''The Studio''**

Kakuzu: oh, this is fantastical! just what we need, another hobo! (note the sarcasm)

Hidan: oh for the love of, sigh you have said that to the last 3 and 1/2 people we've met! that's impolite! lady, can you please tell us how to get out of here and to American Idol?

Madonna: it'll cost you $72.65.

Kakuzu: BOOYAH! who's wrong now?! i told you she was a hobo!

Hidan: oh, will you shut the fuck up? she's not a hobo, she's just trying to cheat us! i can't afford that! do i look like mikal jaxon to you?! NO! i have better hair!

Madonna: fine...first you call me a hobo! that was rude, but now this?! you're such men! you losers are in deep shit now! i've been sent here to stop you in the name of THE MUFFIN MAN!!!1!!! now...DIE! (throws bomb)

Bomb: yo! im a bomb! ph33r m3h, t3h l337 h4x0rZ!

(boom)

Kakuzu: God Damn!

Hidan: holy shit, she's CRAZY!

Madonna: shut up, mofoz! my feeble mind can not understand why that bomb didn't kill you! but, you will never reach your destination as long as i'm in this story!

Hidan: Jashin, bitch! were just trying to fucking get directions! will you calm down?

Kakuzu: Retard! didn't you just hear her?! doesn't it concern you just a little that the muffin man wants us dead?! he doesn't even _live _in Japan! he must be pissed that he had to pay airline taxes for Madonna to kill us!

Hidan: WTF, dude! what the hell is an airline tax?!

Kakuzu: i don't know, i'm ranting, you mofo!

Madonna: HEY! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!!!!!!! you're just doing this because i'm female, aren't you!?

Hidan: oh, for the love of Jashin! let me guess, your whole life you've used the ''because i'm a girl'' excuse! do we look like sexists to you?! NO! we just wanna get directions to the American Idol studio! so, in the name of the Lord, is that REALLY so much to ask?! NO! just tell us! And--

Kakuzu: STFU, Hidan! you're not Dane Cook! quit this pointless rant! it pains my ears!

Hidan: no, YOU STFU, i'm ranting here! Lady, you are a seriously crazed up fruit loop! and if you keep throwing talking bombs at us that think that they are t3h l337 h4x0rZ, then you are those star-shaped fruit loops that taste like processed shit! even those hobos that scare children at night were more helpful at giving directions then you are!

Kakuzu: Hidan! for the last time, those were NOT bad directions! and she's TRYING to kill us! NOW PAY ATTENTION TO THE HOOKER!

Hidan: i've already told you--

Madonna: OH, NOW YOU'VE DONE IT! grows MUAHAHA! WHAT NOW, BITCHES?!?!

Hidan: well, it looks like SOMEBODY missed nappy time...

Kakuzu: are you a natural blonde?! or were you just born retarded?!

Hidan: IT'S NOT BLONDE!!!1!!!!! and this goes out to all you fanartists, if your going to draw me bad (like you already do) then at least give me the right hair color! it's not blonde, it's SILVER! and my eyes are PINK! not purple!

Kakuzu: what ever, but this is the LAST time we get directions from fungi-eating hobos! look at this mofo we have to kill!

Madonna: (starts throwing boulders and bombs and shit at Hidan and Kakuzu)

Hidan: okay, listen, we need to sit-down and have a SERIOUS talk about your attitude...

(large fire-demon cat goes flying at Hidan)

Hidan: Holy Crap! (dodges)

(very large series of big explosions)

Hidan: fucking shit! Madonna's lost it! damn fruit loops! this proves my theory that women posses the power to blow up the world! one second i'm trying to get directions to American Idol, and the next i'm battling to the death with a fruit-loop celebrity that possessed by a demon cat that's on FIRE! WTF did i do to deserve this, Jashin-sama?! first we get lost, and then we meet this whacked-out mofo!

Madonna: OH NO, YOU DI'ENT!

Hidan: (does his Jashin ritual morphy-thing) (stabs himself through the heart)

Madonna: FUCK! (dies)

Kakuzu: damn, wake up Hidan, it's not nap time yet!

Hidan: WTF!? YOUR ALIVE?! AND YOU LEAVE ME ALONE TO KILL THIS MOFO?! and i'm not sleeping, i'm performing a ritual!

Kakuzu: god, i leave for a few lines, and when i come back your lying asleep with a pike through your heart in a satanic circle!? no upside-down star pentagram?! no 666 on your forehead!? your hobbies are some fucked up shit, dude.

Hidan: i was NOT asleep, damn you! and do i mock YOUR religion?! i think NOT! stupid Catholics. and why would you leave me alone with this crazy chick when you know i'm not good with women?! it's like my senior prom all over again. WHY JASHIN-SAMA!? WHYYYYYYYY!?!?!?!?!?!!?!? how could you do that to me, Kakuzu!?

Kakuzu: i fucking got us a map! Texaco had a sale! and i also got a starbucks.

Hidan: kick ass! where's mine?!

Kakuzu: why should i waste my money on you?! and i didn't honestly expect you to live...

Hidan: YOU SUCK! go back and get me starbucks, right now!

Kakuzu: i'm not going back just for fucking starbucks!

Zetsu: for the love of Jack Sparrow--

Hidan and Kakuzu: CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow!

Zetsu: whatever, just get back to work! you're making me miss the previews for ''Hannible Rising'' oh, and thanks for the slushie, Kakuzu.

Hidan: WHAT?! you get a slushie for this creep, but you don't get me anything? you are SO not getting that Wii you wanted for your birthday.

Zetsu: damn, that's harsh man.

Hidan: he didn't get me starbucks!

Zetsu: HOLY CRAP! that was sarcasm. (leaves)

Kakuzu: for that, i'm not getting you that puppy you wanted for Christmas.

Hidan: you jack ass! you know i wanted that puppy! i was gonna name him Mr. Fluffyness! all this just for not getting your beloved partner some coffee!

Kakuzu: well, that's too damn bad! if i don't get my Nintendo Wii, then your not getting your puppy.

Hidan: dude, remember i'm the guy that killed Madonna inside of a ''satanic circle''. i will kill you if i have to, i've killed for less.

Kakuzu: you mean like you killed that entire staff from IHOP?

Dr.Spaz (me): ya'll both shut up. the files told you that this here chick was off her rocker...oh, god...you two were looking for American Idol again, weren't you?! that's like, two miles east, you retards.

Hidan: seriously?! Jashin, we SUCK!

Kakuzu:...shut up, Hidan.

**At the American Idol Studio**

Hidan: holy shit man, we DO suck...

Kakuzu: how the hell could we miss THIS?! it's HUGE! what if this is the wrong place? we've been fooled before...like when Itachi sent me to Costco saying it was church...oh, the horrible Labor Day prices...i was in rehab for a week...

Hidan and Kakuzu: (break down the door)

**Inside**

Monk#1: Sir! someone just broke down the door!

**Outside**

Hidan: damn! were fooled AGAIN! we were better off taking directions from those hobos!

**Inside**

Monk#1: sir, Monk#3 is watching Days Of Our Lives again! and two terrorists with pimp hats are here!

**Outside**

Hidan: who the hell is this old shit?! shouldn't you be watching Richard Simmons, or something?!

Kakuzu: watch it, Hidan! he might use that sash to build working paper grasshoppers that will drop nuclear war heads on us!

Hidan: WTF!? he's an old bald mofo! he can't do anything that awesome!

Monk#2: i am NOT an old bald mofo! and how dare you brainless idiots tresspass here! it is a holy place--DAMN, I'M MISSING DR.PHIL!

Hidan: dude, why does everyone like Dr.Phil?! he's just a female Oprah for Jashin's sake! all he does is talk about people having issues and needing therapy!

Kakuzu: what?! you mistake the magical powers of Dr.Phil! he has strange powers! he knows how to help you solve your problems! all Oprah does is get in your head and start hacking away with a fucking katana! she is an evil brain ninja!

Hidan: holy shit! you mean Dr. Phil is a HE and Oprah is a SHE?! when did that happen?!

Kakuzu: when the Pie-toe commanded it of them.

Hidan: what ever, Kakuzu, yo, old dude, can you tell us how to get to get to American Idol?

Monk: NEVER!

Hidan and Kakuzu: then DIE!!!!!

(insert big fighting scene here)

Kakuzu: wow, i feel kinda bad...we killed all these guys...and they were MONKS, after all...were definitely going to Hell for this...

Hidan: well, no shit you mofo! we've been hellbound ever since we blew up Wal-mart because they didn't have pancakes! Curse their pancakey goodness!

Dr.Spaz: wow, guys. now you've killed a temple full of monks. who's next? The staff of my middle school (preferably Ms. Garvin, the evil bitch)? Simon Cowl?

Hidan: why the fuck do you think were trying to get to the American Idol studio? to kill Cowl! and we didn't mean to kill them.

Dr.Spaz: oh, likely story. so you mean to say that you ACCIDENTALLY killed an entire temple full of monks?!

Hidan: yup, pretty much.

Dr.Spaz:...(leaves)

Kakuzu: great. now what?!

A/N: the Pie-toe is copyright of my friend Sammy. use it, and i'll come into your house at night and cut your fucking head off.

so, yeah...i'll probably make a new chappie when i get more inspiration...if you have any ideas, send them to me...and those overly religious people who took offense in this chapter: IT'S A JOKE. i'm not some satanist. i'm an atheist. and those of you who where up there wondering ''who the hell is Dane Cook'' need to get mauled by a Hidan-bunny.

and those of you who may attend Arbor Creek Middle School, would most likely believe me when i say that Ms. Garvin is and evil bitch that need sto rot in hell.

flame me if you want, i could seriosly care less.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: okay, this is chapter two of Hidan and Kakuzu's journey...i'm hoping to have at least five chapters...review people! give me ideas!

Disclaimer: i don't own Naruto or any of the characters. i only own the plot of this story.

**At the Akatsuki Base**

Pein (for those of you don't know who don't know who this is should stop reading right now): i can't believe you two! first you blow up wal-mart, and now you've killed Madonna! what is with you guys?!

Hidan: we must kill Simon Cowl! therefore we must get to the American Idol studio!

Zetsu: yo, we got company, and they don't got waffles!

Hidan: DAMMIT! why does no one follows that rule?! is it so hard to bring your favorite crimanals some waffles?!

Kakuzu: shut up, moron.

Hidan: no you shut up!

Kakuzu: no, YOU shut up!

Hidan: freak!

Kakuzu: mofo!

Hidan: frankenstein!

Kakuzu: rip off artist!

Hidan: ME?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO GETS YOUR HAIR CUT AT COSTCO!

Pein: holy shit! since when do they cut hair?!

Kakuzu: since i threatened them! now can we focus on the demons that defy our laws of waffleie goodness?!

Pein: oh, yeah! Itachi, go take care of them!

Itachi: (morphs in out of a bottle o' milk)...fine...(leaves)

**Elsewhere with Kakashi and Naruto (cause this is my story, so i can do whatever i want)**

Kakashi: Naruto...where are the waffles?!

Naruto: what waffles, sensei?

Kakashi: YOU MEAN WE DON'T GOT WAFFLES! THIS AIN'T GONNA GO DOWN PRETTY!

Naruto:...what do mean?!

Kakashi: Naruto, very bad things happen to people who don't listen to the waffle law!

Itachi: (appears)where are ma waffles, fools?!

Kakashi: you can't say that! this ain't gangsta!

Itachi:...i can do what ever i want...because i have achieved the unacheiveable...

Naruto: you mean you kicked a puppy?!

Itachi: no...I KILLED THE MILKMAN!!!!!!!1!!!

Kakashi: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Naruto: HOW DARE YOU?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Itachi: :3

Naruto: how could you do that?!

Kakashi: isn't it obvious, Naruto? HE'S GAY!

Naruto: HAH?

Itachi: D ...what did you say?

Kakashi: you heard me, mofo!

Itachi:...I AIN'T GAY!1!

Dr.Spaz: that's it, this Hidan and Kakuzu's Story, i'm ending this interlude, NOW.

**The next day with Hidan and Kakuzu**

Hidan: it's christmas! WOO! (headbangs)

Kakuzu: whatever, mofo...here (gives Hidan his gift) it's the puppy you wanted.

Hidan:THIS ISN'T A PUPPY, IT'S A COW!

Kakuzu:...so? what's the difference?

Cow: n00b. n00b. n00b. (repeats n00b)

Hidan: WTF?! KAKUZU! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING?! IT'S CALLING ME A N00B!

Kakuzu: it only speaks the truth, Hidan.

Cow:n00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00bn00b(splodes which causes a series of mushroom clouds to form)

Hidan: what in the name of all the holy crapitty crapish crapityness of HOLY FUCKING CRAP was THAT?!?!?!?!?!?!

Kakuzu: what do you mean?

Hidan: OMJ, ARE YOU SERIOUS?! THIS COW-THING JUST REPEATED N00B LIKE, 43 TIMES, THEN EXPLODED! the next thing you know some freak is gonna forget to put on his aluminum hat in the morning, then the next thing you know the voices are telling him to kill some gremlins!

Mushroom Cloud: YOU DARE TO MOCK T3H COW O' N00BZ?!

Kakuzu: holy shit! it's possessed!

Random Guy: DUN DUN DUN!

Kakuzu: (pulls out laser and zaps a rock which morphs into a telletubbie that begins to do the Irish jig)

Mushroom Cloud: MY EYES! THEY BURN!

Random Guy: DUN DUN DUN!

Herd O' Singing Llamas: SCILENCE, MOFO! (proceed to beat the living shit out of the random guy singing dramatic music)

Kakuzu: Hidan, it's not working!

Hidan: then...we must sink to drastic measures...

Hidan and Kakuzu: (turn to each other) may the Force be with you! (put arms around each others shoulders)

CAN YOU DO THE CAN-CAN

CAN YOU DO THE CAN-CAN

(proceed to do the can-can)

Mushroom Cloud: NO!!!!!! (dies)

Singing Llamas: (singing) n00bs...

Hidan: I'M NOTTA N00B!

Random Guy: d-d-dun, d-du--

Singing Llamas: SCILENCE! (tample the random guy once again)

Hidan:...Kakuzu, what're we gonna do about that teletubbie?

Teletubbie: (dies) (suddenly bursts into flames)

Kakuzu:...ah, nothing...

Hidan:...

Kakuzu: OH MY GOD! HAS THE APOCALYPSE COME, OR HAVE YOU STOPPED TALKING?!

Hidan: oh, fuck you!

Brittany Spears: (appears out of no where) YOU'VE KILLED MADONNA! NOW ME AND THE REST OF US ARE GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!

Hidan: we?

Brittany: yeah! introducing: Avril Lavinge, Sara Paxton, and Christina Aguleria!

all 3: (suddenly appear)

Avril Lavinge: it's goin' down!

Hidan:...crap...and it's not even 10:30 yet...

A/N: i should be stabbed repeatedly with pointy metal objects just for the sheer stupidity of this...i need more reviews! for those who already have, i thank:

MasterSage1493

FearDePucca

and my friend Nik, A.K.A

Malonlonlon

so, anyway...i hope you enjoyed chapter 2!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: yo i'm back...not that anyone really cares...for those who actually DO, i've had writers block lately, and i can't sleep for some reason...so...life sucks.

disclaimer: i don't own Naruto, or any of the characters. if i did, then this peice o' crap wouldn't be JUST a fanfiction...

Britney: insert evil blonde celebrity laugh here 

Hidan: oO;...

Kakuzu:(speechless)

Avril: it's goin' DOWN!!!

Hidan: you already said that you stupid-ass poser!!

Avril: OH, NOW YOU DONE IT!!

Kakuzu: so, blonde mofos, how dis gonna go down?

Britney: WIT T3H L337 PWNEEZ!!

Kakuzu: lulz joo thix t4ht U kan outsmartz m4h wit ur l337 pwnzirz!!

Hidan: (no comment)

Britney: who b t3h l337st pwnsta?!

Hidan: why do i even bother showing up anymore?

Kakuzu: lulz, Hidan, she thinx dat she be t3h l337 pwnsta!!1

Hidan: will you break free of the horrible--GOOD JASHIN!! IT'S T3H TACO-BELL DOG!!

Kakuzu: OMG! WE GOTZTA CHASE IT!!

Britney: hey-- insert horriffic gorey heart-rippy noises here 

Avril, Christina, and Sara: OH SHITZ!! (die)

Hidan: TO THE POPE-MOBILE!! (Kakuzu and Hidan jump into pope-mobile)

Kakuzu: SHIT!! (loud schreeching noises)

Hidan: OMJ, YOU JUST RAN OVER T3H TACO-BELL DOG!!

Cops: freeze!! your under arrest!

insert big chasing scene like the one from 'Heat' here 

Hidan: Kakuzu! look out for the--(crash)

Kakuzu: fuck...i just drove us into a ravine...we better have insurance...

Hidan: YOU JUST MADE ME GO INTO CARDIAC-ARREST LIKE 5 TIMES, OUT-CHASED THE COPS AND DROVE US INTO A RAVINE!! YOUR WORRIED ABOUT **CAR INSURANCE**?!?!?!?!!?1/!?! I COULD HAVE DIED!!

Kakuzu: you sound like an old whiny bitch!! your ALIVE, aren't you?!

Hidan: well, no fucking DER ya'foo'!!1

Kakuzu: i ain't a n00b!! u can't use t3h '!!1'!!1

Cop: I SAID STOP YA'--(scream)

Hidan: yessssss, Jashin-samaaaaa the pain feels so good!

Kakuzu: Hidan, we got problems! The Taco Bell dog ain't wakin' up!

Hidan: insert erotic bird calls here 

Kakuzu: Where the hell did you learn that?!

Hidan: Jashin boyscouts!

Kakuzu: --;;

Taco Bell Dog: I LIVE!! (runs away)

Kakuzu: OH, SHIT!! WE'RE GONNA MISS OUR FLIGHT!

Hidan: Fuck, your right! But how are we gonna get there fast?

Kakuzu: (evil grin)

Hidan: Dammit...I hate that grin...

--X--

**ON THE AIRPLANE**

Kakuzu: See, Hidan? didn't it work?

Hidan: I DIDN'T THINK I WAS GONNA HAVE TO BE YOUR BITCH, YOU ASSFUCK!!

Kakuzu: Oh, STFU. It's not like I wanted to be a pimp!!

Hidan: Yes you did!!

Ceiling Compartment: (disperses water onto Hidan's head)

Hidan: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!?!!?

Ceiling Compartment: My mistake...(disperses more water onto his head)

Hidan: WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO THIS TIME?!

Ceiling Compartment: Nothing, I just don't like you.

Charlie The Unicorn: I'VE FOUND YOU TWO, FINALLY!!

Hidan: insert gasp here IT'S CHARLIE!!

Charlie: Yesh...yesh, it is...now...let's figh--AHH!!

Chuck Norris: TAKE 'DAT, FO'SHO!! pwns Charlie 

Charlie: gets pwnt 

Kakuzu: There's something wrong with society...

Hidan: I blame Global Warming...

Group Of Russian Nazis: DIE HIDAN AND KAKUZU!!

Hidan and Kakuzu: kill the Nazis, cuz Nazis suck and need to die 

Kakuzu: Hidan, the've killed the pilot!!

Hidan: Oh noes, we gonna CRASH muthafukkas!!

insert huge-ass plane crash here 

Hidan: where did we land? OH, FUCK NO!! NOT T3H GHETTO!!

--X--TBC--X--

A/N: I finally updated...not that anyone reads this story...PLEASE PEOPLE, REVIEW!!

And, just because I'm random, has anyone else been laughing their ass off at the pathetic Naruto theories these days? For example:

"Tobito" Theory:

1. Tobi is Madara. The Manga has alreasy established that factoid.

2. Obito got half his face crushed by a rock, and the other eye he gave to Kakashi.

Amiright?

Random Situation of the Day:

Pein: Naruto...I'M YOUR FATHER!!

Naruto: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Pein: And your BROTHER!!

Naruto: N--wait...WTF?! Is that even POSSIBLE?!

Pein: Well, actually yes. You see--

Naruto: I don't even WANT to know.


	4. Chapter 4

The Journey Chapter 4!!!

A/N: No one ever reiews for this peice of, shit, WHY THE HELL NOT??!?!?!?!?!!!!?

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto or Akatsuki, my name would be Masashi Kishimoto. Bt it's not. Therefore, I don't own Naruto.

Kakuzu: Dammit, this fucking SUCKS!!

Hidan: What the fuck kind of ghetto is this, anyway?

Kakuzu: (picks up random civillian) Yo, where are we, foo'?!

Random Civillian: We be in east Germany, fo'sho.

Hidan: There's a GHETTO in EAST GERMANY??!?!?!!

DrSpaz20: There is now.

Hidan: You can't just put a ghetto in Germany!! What's wrong with thou?!

Kakuzu: What the Helle?! Why art thou speaking in Olde English?!

Hidan: The curseth be upon thou, tooeth!!

Random Civillian: THIS IS SPARTANETH!!

Hidan: Why the fucketh doth there be a curse upon this ghettoeth?

Kakuzu: Let's get the Helle out of hereth before the Bird Be Beckoning Thoueth!!

Pope: MAY THE FORCE BLESS THOU IN HARMONIC BLAH N' SHITEHT!!

Dalai Lama: (appears) YOU!! MY MORTAL ENEMY, ZE POPETH!!

Pope: Thou is goin' down fo'shoeth!!

Dalai Lama: Don't make me do the H-formation-eth!!

Pope: (pulls out a salami)

Dalai Lama: (pulls out an umbrella)

Both: insert huge dramatic action scene from Lord Of The Rings here 

Hidan: Hey!! This is OUR story!!

Kakuzu: (sings annoying Vonage jingle) oo-oo-oooo-oo!!

Hidan: That wasn't random at all...oO

Zetsu: (comes up out of the ground) WE NEED EVERYONE AT THE BASE **STAT!!** (leaves)

Hidan: We beter go...

Kakuzu: Yeah...

Both: (Go back ot the base)

**AT THE AKATSUKI BASE**

Pein: Hidan, Kakuzu!! Thank god your here!!

Hidan: It's 'Thank Jashin-Sama', dumbass.

Pein: Whatever, we've got problems!!

Kakuzu: What kind of 'problems'?

Pein: (shiver) Konan is PMSing!!

Hidan: This is something new?

Pein: Not only Konan...Deidara is also PMSing!!

Konan: FUCK YOU!!

Deidara: NO, FUCK YOU!!

Konan: OH NO, YOU DI'ENT!!

Deidara: OH, YES I DID!!

Both: **IT'S ON, BITCH!!**

---TBC---


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: So no one reviews this…if you actually do read this, please review!! It just takes two little clicks of your mouse. Even if you think it's a piece of shit, just review….

Random Question: What would happen to America if the Bible said you weren't allowed to eat donuts?

Hidan: Holla Shait…what just happened?

Kakuzu: I'm not sure…hey, do you hear that?

Hidan: Hear what?

Kakuzu: That sound…don't you hear it?

Hidan: Hm…(listens) It sounds like…Oh, HEALL NO!!

Audience: insert dramatic gasp here 

Germ-a-phobic Pedestrian: Oh shizzle, what's happening?!

Hidan: No!! It's Piff!! T3h wannabe American gangsta that be sellin' fruits on 'da freeway fo'sho!!

Piff: And I got mah crew 'wit me!

Crew: Ballin'!!

Kakuzu:………….'Da fuck? I am so going to need therapy after this…

Piff: Wo, wo, wo!! Where's mah tunez, homiez?!

Crew: (Starts music)

Music: They see me rollin'….they hatin'….they hopin' that they goan' catch me RIDIN' DIRTY

Kakuzu: What is this? And WHY is Piff's crew a bunch of vegetables?!

Piff: Because that's how I roll, Homie-G.

Melon: I'm a to-mater…duh….

Kakuzu??

Hidan??

Crew??

Piff: Dude…you SO ain't my bro any more…

Hidan: Hang on a sec…Piff, you ain't Gangsta!!

Piff: What'd you just say ta me?! I gots 'da SKILLZ…but what do you got?

Hidan: I GOTS MAH POKEMANZ!!

Jashin: (Appears out of the sky )

Hidan: OMFG, JASHIN-SAMA!! (Bows)

Jashin: Hidan…as a loyal follower of Jashin, I demand you show me your pokemanz!!

Piff: Jashin!! Finally, I have met you!! I now challenge you to a game of DDR!!

Jashin: Bring it ON, biatch!!

DDR Mat: (morphs in out of a baby's ass) (don't ask) ARE YOU READY ?!!

Jashin: Oh yeah, I am SO dancing to Cascada!!

DDR: (Up, up, down, right, left, left, left, right, up, down, right,)

Piff: (Has skills)

Jashin: (Don't gotz 'da Piff-ish skillorz)

Hidan: No!! Jashin-sama, you cannot be out-DDR'd by a Taco!!

Audience: inset the uber-dramatic gasp here OH SNAPPLE APPLE DAPPLE!! YOU MEAN PIFF IS A TACO?!

Piff: No!! Mah secreats are outs!!

Hidan: :3

Kakuzu: 'Da fuck? Where is Dr.Phil when you need him?

Obama: He was fired fo'sho!

Jashin: OMG, IT'S MY HOMIE!!

Jashin Followers: FROM THE "O" TO 'DA "B" TO 'DA "AMA"

Piff: Jashin got a brodda?!

Kakuzu: From anodda modda?!

Jashin: Mah daddeh ain't no playa, heathen!! D 

Hidan: KAKUZU!! DID YOU NOT JUST HEAR WHAT OBAMA SAID?!!!!

Kakuzu:…………………………Uh…………………Uh………………..Wait…..Oh no, he di'ent.

Crew: Huh?

Hidan: OH SHIT, HE REALIZED IT!! EVERYONE, DUCK!!

Pigeon: IMMA CACTUS, YOU RELIGIOUS CUNT!!! D 

Hidan: What?????

Kakuzu:….Dr.Phil…was fired….DR.PHIL…..**WAS FIRED**….FUCKINGASSHOLEHEATHENISTICMOTHERFUCKERSbleepbleep

Hidan: OO;;

Crew: OO;;

Obama: AW SHITZ MAN, HE AIN'T GOWNE KIWL ME, IDDY?! I GOTZ TA BEAT 'DA SHITZ OUTTA 'DAT CLINTON HO!! PHUCKS!!

Kakuzu:………………………………..And do you know what happens now?

Hidan: Do we want to?

Kakuzu: Yesh………………I will—

---------------------TBC-----------------

A/N: Yes, I did put Obama and Hillary in here. It doth beeth for da lulz, therefore lulz stimulators must thereth reside. (For dumbfucks, that means live with it).

Oh, and if anyone has any suggestions for this story, let me know. Or you will never know what Kakuzu is going to do next.

Akatsuki belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, and Obama belongs to….himself.

But Piff, the Crew, and the Pigeon that thinks he is a cactus belong to me. No copywrite, or THE BUNNY GETS IT.


End file.
